Every year, The Washington Post runs a contest where readers twist their words. Word-geek fun! Here are some of the highlights:
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
The paper’s Style Invitational also encourages wild abadon with language by messing with words, adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and then supplying a new definition.
1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.
7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.
12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
16. Ignoranus (n): A person who’s both stupid and an asshole.
With brilliance like this, I am given renewed hope that — all the interweb’s LOLs aside — our human love for the crafting of words will never die.